Harry Potter and the Harem of Honeys
by szordara
Summary: Harry’s destiny has taken a sharp turn from what was intended. At age seven, he figures out that he can make things happen at will, like magic. He forms a gang of Dudley's female victims, who gather for mutual protection and later friendship. Together,
1. Discovering his Gift

Summary: Harry's destiny has taken a sharp turn from what was intended. At age seven, he figures out that he can make things happen at will, like magic. He uses this ability to counter his bullying cousin, Dudley, and form a gang of his own. Harry's gang is composed entirely of female members – except of course for Harry himself. They band together to protect themselves from the Dursley gang, and form a life-long friendship that is almost like a family. When he received his Hogwarts letter, Harry James Potter is a strong, confident young man. A young man who takes his duty to protect his girls very seriously. Lucky for him, one of his girls has a cousin visiting at the time he receives his letter, and that cousin just happens to be a fifth year witch.

Warning: This story is being rated as mature. Come on, the word 'harem' is part of the title. I'm sure you can figure out where this is going...

Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

Author's note: This is my first posted attempt at fanfiction. As such, the story will deviate from the books and movies. Hopefully, some of you readers will find it interesting, and possibly feel inspired to add your own variation of the Harry Potter story to this forum.

* * *

**Harry Potter and the Harem of Honeys**

**Discovering his Gift**

It was a normal day at the school, even if this boy was anything but normal. Of course, normal is a matter of perspective. To the other children around him, he was far from normal. If he was among his own kind, he would still be a tad unusual, but much closer to the so-called "norm". You see, this boy's name is Harry Potter, and he is a wizard by birth. Not that he himself knows anything about that... yet. His guardians, his Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon, have carefully hidden all knowledge of magic, or anything that they consider outside the "norm", from him.

Today, however, he will learn something about himself, and it will steer him away from the path that fate and a meddlesome old man had planned for this little boy. At this time, little Harry is only 7 years old. His second year of primary school had just started,  
but already his overweight cousin Dudley and his gang of hooligans were making sure that Harry had no friends at all...

* * *

"There he goes! Get him!" yelled Dudley. His band of playground thugs were chasing that odd Potter boy. None of Dudley's friends knew why this particular boy was the focus of their leader's aggressions, and quite frankly they could care less. Dudley told them to beat him up, and that was fine with them. They liked beating up other kids, particularly ones who were smaller and weaker than themselves. That meant that Potter, a few other small boys, and virtually all the girls in their class were targeted for beatings.

"Hurry up! He's trying to hide by the dust bins!" shouted Dudley's second in command, Piers. Piers Polkis was a rat-faced boy who happened to be the smallest member of the gang. Normally, he would be a target, but Piers had that special quality that bullies the world over looked for in a henchman. Piers was a toady. He was mean and clever, which meant that he was able to avoid his beating by encouraging the gang to beat up others. It was his self-made job to direct the mini-mountains he called his friends towards their targets. When the target was caught, he would hold their arms behind their backs while the bigger boys pounded on them until they got bored. Plus, he had the cowards gift of knowing when authority figures would appear, moments before they actually did. Piers kept the others out of trouble most of the time, and was clever enough to talk them out of is on the rare occasions that they did get caught in the act.

Meanwhile, young Harry was running like the wind. He may not look it, with the oversized hand-me-down clothes he got from his over sized cousin and his lean frame, but Harry was very fast. Growing up in the Dursley household had forced him to develop superior reflexes. While he may not be strong, he was very fast. Right now, we used that skill to evade the Dursley gang.

Rounding the corner that went behind the school, he saw the dust bins and decided to use them as cover. In fact, he could probably hide on top of the large dumpster behind them, if he could just get there before the others reached him. With a desperate need to evade another beating in the front of his mind, he made a mighty leap while wishing to be out of their reach.

What happened next was a mystery, for he suddenly found himself on top of the school's roof. Now, how the bloody hell did he manage to jump onto the roof? Maybe a gust of wind caught him, filling Dudley's old sweat shirt like the sails of a sailing ship? No, that didn't make any sense. While his grades didn't reflect it (he was punished if his grades were better than Dudley's), Harry was a bright lad. The shirt could not have provided enough lift to raise him to the roof. Besides, he had move up in opposition to the prevailing winds. So, how had he gotten up here?

Calming himself, he sat down and reviewed exactly what had led up to this unusual event. While he was at it, he began to ponder some of the other unusual events in his life. Suddenly, he made a connection. Whenever he had felt very strong emotions, whether it was fear, anger, anxiety, or what have you, strange things happened. The kind of things that were so un-Dursley-ish, that he would receive extra harsh punishments. Somehow, someway, Harry was able to do things that no one else he knew could manage.

Magic things.

"I need to test this," he said to himself. "If I can learn to use this... power... at will, I will be free of Dudley and his gang." So, young Harry sat down on that roof, skipped his classes, and began to focus on his feelings. After all, the first step would be to purposefully draw out an extreme emotion, then use it to do something magical intentionally rather than accidentially.

Sinking into a rough meditative state, he started to work himself up by thinking about how his aunt and uncle would react to his being caught up on the roof. Memories of past beatings and punishments made it rather easy to work himself into a panic. Just as his fears reached their peak, he felt something... different. There was a strange tingling down his spine, like something was waiting to happen.

Quickly, he seized upon that feeling, and said, "I wish I was on the ground!" There was a soft 'pop' sound, and Harry found himself sitting in the exact same position he had been in on the roof, only now he was seated on the grass beneath an oak tree on the playground. "YES!" crowed the young wizard.

"How did you do that?" Harry jumped up, to find a girl about his age sitting in the branches of that oak tree. "You just appeared out of no where!" Looking closely, Harry saw that the young girl showed signs of the gang's attentions. She had a black eye, a split lip, and her dress was torn.

"Actually, I came from the roof. I was hiding from Them," he declared, letting her know that they shared tormenters. "I just figured out how to do that... thing. I 'popped' from the roof to here."

"Wicked!" she enthused. "Can you teach me to do it?"

"I don't know. I just figured out that I have been able to do stuff like that for years. Only, I never realized that it was me who was doing all the strange stuff. But today, it all sort of connected in my head."

"Oh," she sighed. "Well, maybe I can help you to learn to do it better!" She climbed down from the tree. "My name is Marie. Marie Caldwell."

"I'm Harry. Harry Potter," he replied.

* * *

Little did anybody know, but that was the moment that young Harry's destiny hit a bump in the road. This wasn't just a little bump, either. It was more like a bump on a mountain road, that launches your car off the road and down the side of the mountain. Both paths get you to the bottom, but the routes get you there in entirely different conditions.

Young Harry should have crashed down the side of that mountain, reaching the bottom as a fiery wreck. That bump in the road, however, enabled him to bounce back onto the road, and coast down the mountain in style. When he finally rejoined his world – the wizarding world – we would be far different that fate had intended...


	2. The Letter

**The Letter **

Fate had planned a very different childhood for Harry Potter, but that path had long since passed. Instead of a lonely, downtrodden child, the nearly 11-year-old boy had an abundance of close friends. Not many people living on Privet Drive took note of the fact that every single one of his friends were female. Years ago, when his cousin Dudley had formed a gang of local thugs, Harry had prevented them from bullying the local girls. His efforts made him the head of an all-girl (except for Harry) gang that was many times larger than Dudley's. From that day forth, nearly every girl in the local school – and thus the neighborhood – looked towards Harry for friendship and protection.

Friendship soon led to other things, as every girl in his gang learned to kiss with Harry. He became the target of their emerging feminine wiles, and he had soon learned enough to gently guide his many friends through their new emotions. His ability to accept without judgement earned their absolute trust and devotion.

Chubby or thin, beautiful or plain... he treated them all the same. From Harry, his girls learned to be comfortable with themselves, and that eventually led to their possessing considerable self confidence. What neither Harry nor the girls knew was that Harry's emerging magic was aiding him in helping each of the girls change and grow. His power ensured that they would grow and evolve in ways that would refine their natural beauty, sharpen their young minds, and bring them strength that otherwise may never have become theirs. Eventually, this would lead to their giving birth to magical offspring, despite their non-magical natures. Harry's accidental magic would, in fact, slowly change them all into something never before seen in the wizarding world – muggle born squibs.

But that was the future. In the present, young Harry had several dozen girlfriends whose ages ranged from 8 to 12. They taught him (and one another) everything that they knew about their gender. They also shared any and all skills that they possessed, including the dance, yoga, karate, meditation, and other lessons that the various girls were taking.

The girls shared him as 'communal property', told him every secret, and shared every treat they received from their own parents. Young Harry was the beneficiary of dozens of allowances, birthday parties, and gifts from grandparents. The girls fixed his hand-me-down wardrobe, got him new glasses when needed, and ensured that he was properly fed for a change.

In return for all of that, he was their knight in shining armor. He placed himself between his girls and any of the local bullies, Dudley and his gang being the worst of the bunch. Using their teachings, he slowly developed control over his accidental magic. This, too, was turned to their benefit. With it, he could fix broken possessions, heal injuries, and take them on wonderful childhood adventures.

Despite slander from his aunt and uncle, the parents of Harry's girls all adored their respective daughter's 'boyfriend'. Possibly because he was very respectful, or perhaps because the children were too young to have 'those' types of feelings, they felt comfortable allowing their little girls to associate with the Potter lad. Of course, the fact that the 'herd' of young girls and Harry would move from house to house doing each girl's chores had something to do with it. (You'd be amazed by how fast nearly 40 children could rake and clean a yard.)

Harry's aunt and uncle had learned to let him have his freedom during the summer breaks. If they tried to keep him locked up at home, the horde of girls would soon descend upon Number 4 Privet Drive, demanding the return of their play-mate. They did not like it, but so many girls drew far too much attention to them for the old habits of abusing their nephew to continue. Thus, they now preferred for Harry to spend as much time away from their house as possible.

Luckily for them, Harry and the girls had claimed the local park as their 'territory'. Woe befall any child or teen who disobeyed their rules for said 'turf.' That park was the cleanest, tidiest children's playground in all of London. It was also the safest, due to the magical wards and protections that Harry had places there – both intentionally and by accident. No bullies felt comfortable in that park, and no dangerous animals would go near it. The Dursley's absolutely hated the place. Oddly enough, snakes found it to be a haven, and not a one ever so much as hissed at one of the children who played there.

* * *

On a fateful day in July, shortly before Harry's eleventh birthday, he was checking the mail before leaving the Dursley house. There was a post card from Vernon's sister, Marge, and an advertisement for something Harry couldn't be bothered with. The final piece of post caught his attention, however, since it was addressed to him. That was not unheard of, since the girls usually send him birthday and Christmas cards. Seeing as it was a bit early for his birthday, and the fact that the letter was written on heavy parchment, he considered this letter to be unusual. Also, when he touched it he could feel that tingle that he had come to associate with his magics.

Since he shared everything with his herd of girlfriends, it was only natural that he brought the strange letter with him to the park. When he arrived, there were already over 20 girls present, setting up blankets, coolers, and picnic baskets in the shade of several large trees. He spotted a few others cleaning up the night's accumulation of litter, to be deposited in the dust bins. (They maintained a very tidy park, after all.)

"Hello, Harry!" greeted the girls.

"Good morning, my beautiful friends," he greeted back. "I got something strange in the post today. Did any of you send me this letter?" He held it up, showing the green ink on the front, then turned it to show the odd wax seal on the back. The wax was purple, and the seal was in the shape of a lion, snake, badger, and raven surrounding a letter 'H'.

"I've seen one of those before." They all turned to see who had spoken. Though female, the voice was not one that they were familiar with. Coming up behind them were Harry's first friend, Marie, and an older girl who looked enough like her to be family. They both had light brown hair and bright blue eyes. It was the older girl who had spoken. "Marie, is this the boy you wanted me to meet? Your little boyfriend?"

"That would be me," grinned Harry, surprising the older girl by failing to blush.

"Harry, this is my cousin, Ella. Ella, this is our boyfriend, Harry Potter," replied Marie.

"Harry... Potter?" gasped Ella. "You're really Harry Potter? And you have the... the scar?" she squealed in delight. When Harry lifted his bangs to reveal the odd lightning bolt shaped scar on his forehead, Ella nearly swooned. "Oh. My. God. I'm talking to Harry Potter!"

"Are you alright, Ella?" asked Harry.

"Hmm? Oh, I'm fine. I just can't believe that when Marie told me she had a friend named Harry, that he would turn out to be THE Harry Potter! I'm going to go to Hogwarts with Harry Potter!"

"Hogwarts?" "What's Hogwarts?" "Did she say Hogwarts?" The girls began to ask each other.

"Oh no! I'm not supposed to mention Hogwarts or magic to muggles!" gasped Ella.

"Muggles?" asked several girls.

"Don't worry, Ella," soothed her cousin. "We all know about Harry's powers. We've been helping him develop his... magic... for years now."

"You can already do magic?" asked Ella. "You're not supposed to do magic outside of school! They'll kick you out of school, and break your wand!"

"Not to worry then!" grinned Harry. "I don't have a wand to break. Besides, I've only learned to do little things, like healing, teleporting and levitating things." Ella looked, if anything, even more shocked. "Ella, try to calm down. Now, what can you tell me about this Hogwarts, my letter, and I believe you said the word muggles?" He took her hand, and she blushed.

"Okay," she said, "let me see... I suppose I should start with my letter. Like you, I received my first letter when I was 11 years old. That letter is from the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. It is a school where young witches and wizards go to learn how to perform magic. We have classes in things like Potions, Charms, Transfiguration, and Defense Against the Dark Arts. Magic folk have a whole world that is kept secret from non-magic folk, whom we call 'muggles'."

"So, do non-magical people have magical children?" asked one of the girls, named Amber. She was a 9-year-old with blonde hair and light brown eyes. "Because we've all met Harry's family, and if they have magic, I'll eat my shoes!"

"Well, there are muggle-born witches and wizards, but Harry's parents were magical!" argued Ella. "Everyone in our world knows about Harry Potter! You're really famous, Harry!"

"I am? Why?" he asked.

"Because you are The-Boy-Who-Lived!" At their blank looks, she added to her story. "Almost 10 years ago, back when you were still a baby, there was an evil wizard. He delved deeply into the Dark Arts, and was recruiting followers. He claimed that muggles and muggleborn folk were beneath the so-called pureblood families, and he started killing off muggleborns. For some reason, he came to your parents house on Halloween, determined to kill them, too. The story goes that he killed your father and mother, but when he tried to kill you, his magic was turned against him. He was destroyed, and you got that scar."

"And I'm famous for that?" wondered Harry.

"You have to understand, those were Dark days, Harry. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was very powerful back then, and he was winning the war. Good witches and wizards were dying every day. Before you, no one lived after he decided they would die. Because of you, he was defeated and the war was won."

"Well, were my parents both... muggleborn?" he asked.

"Your mother was muggleborn, but not your father. The Potters are a very old, pureblood wizarding family. From what I understand, they were a very wealthy family, too. In fact, I bet you have a ton of gold in Gringotts!" At his confused look, she added, "It's the wizards bank. Run buy goblins, it is!"

"Well, thanks for telling me this, Ella. I'm guessing from what you said earlier, that all of this should be kept secret from muggles?" She nodded enthusiastically. "Tell me, are there ever any non-magical children born to magical families? I mean, if it goes one way, it should also go the other."

"Oh yes! When a witch gives birth to a non-magical child, they're called 'squibs'. They can see through magical illusions, and can use magical devices. Usually, they don't have enough magic to do spells and such, though I've heard that they can get jobs as Potions brewers, Herbologists, and working with some magical creatures. The school's caretaker, Mr. Filch, is a squib. Oh, and the groundskeeper doesn't do magic either... but between you and me, I think Hagrid's part ogre or giant or something. He's huge!"

"That's interesting. So, muggles cannot see most magic? Because my girls here couldn't see some of the barriers at first. I managed to 'change' them over time, though, and now they can see some of the wards I created. I think that I made them into squibs instead of muggles."

"If that's the case, then I won't get into trouble for telling you all about our world. Just don't tell anybody else! You realize that if you are all squibs now, that your children will probably be magical?"

"Really?" "Wicked!" muttered the girls.

"Well, now that you've explained a bit, let me read my letter. Don't worry, girls! I'll let you each read it, too!" Harry broke the seal and began to read his letter. Just as Ella had claimed, it was an acceptance letter to Hogwarts. 'Await your owl?' he thought to himself. He hoped that muggleborns got a different letter, since someone who didn't know all about the magical world – like himself – would have a difficult time understanding most of this. After reading the letter, he found a list of required school supplies, but no indication of where to find any of the magical items.

"This school of yours," he asked Ella, "does it give a different letter to muggleborns? Because this doesn't really help me all that much. How can I send an owl – a real, live owl? Also, where would I go to buy all this stuff? It doesn't say where. Oh, and you mentioned gold... does that mean that magic folk have their own money?"

"Let me see that..." Ella read his letter. "Nope, this is the same letter that I received. However, one of the professors hand delivered mine. Professor Sprout was able to explain all of this to me and my family. She even helped me get to Diagon Alley so I could buy my supplies."

"Well, I guess that since my parents were magical, I didn't rate the personal touch. I guess they forgot that I was raised as a muggleborn. So, you mentioned a place called Diagon Alley. How do I get there?"

"Well, magic folk can just apparate there, if they have a license. It's kind of like driving a car... first you have to be old enough and take a test, then you can do it. They also have a system using fireplaces, called the Floo Network, but to use it you need floo powder, and a fireplace hooked into the network. It's sort of like the underground. Then there's the Knight Bus, but you need a wand to summon it, and they charge for passage. Finally, you can get in from muggle London, seeing as how there is an entrance from the Leaky Cauldron. That's how me and my folks get there."

"So, could you take us on a field trip?" asked Harry. "Show us around the Alley?"

"Me? Take Harry Potter back to his rightful world? Sure!" agreed Ella.

"Alright then. Girls, tomorrow we're going on a day trip to London. Everyone, make sure you have plenty of money for the underground. If I really do have a ton of gold in this wizarding bank, then I'll buy everyone presents once I get my hands on some of it. Now, Ella, let me give you a proper thank-you for all the information you have given me today."

"What kind of thank-y..." Harry cut her off by pressing a gentle kiss to her lips. She blushed but kissed him back. "Oh Merlin! I got kissed by Harry Potter!"

* * *

Later that day, they formalized their plans. Ella would lead Harry and his thirty-seven girls into London, and from there into the wizarding world. They would meet in the park as usual, and from there head out to the city. 


	3. Diagon Alley

Chapter added: _June 5, 2005_

**Diagon Alley:**

"That's it up ahead. The Leaky Cauldron. It is a very famous wizarding pub, and there is an entrance to Diagon Alley in the back. The Cauldron serves both food and drinks, and it has rooms to rent on the upper floors," explained Ella.

The party had successfully navigated their way from the park, to the underground, into London, and finally up to the entrance of the wizarding world. While normally a group of thirty-nine children parading through London would draw attention, Harry had managed to cast some charms about the group... Ella called it a notice-me-not spell, similar to what magic folk used to hide things from muggles.

"That's a famous place?" "Looks awfully dirty!" "People actually eat in there?" came from the girls.

"Well, it is supposed to look that way!" defended Ella. "We can't have trolls and dragons hanging out right in plain sight! With the place looking like this, nobody would go inside even if they could see past the charms and wards. Trust me, the wizarding world gets much more impressive than this. Just wait until you see Gringotts!" She then frowned for a moment. "Just to warn you, the magic world may seem to be a hundred years or so behind the times. Most places still used gas lighting, if they aren't still using wall torches and candles. Electricity usually doesn't work around magic, so you won't see any electric lights."

Harry and his thirty-seven squib girlfriends followed Ella through the doors of the Leaky Cauldron and out to the alley in back. Before anyone could complain, she drew her wand and touched it to the specific bricks that opened the portal to the hidden world. "Ladies and Harry, welcome to Diagon Alley!"

The now stunned children walked slowly through the portal, their eyes dashing from one amazing sight to the next. There were stores selling broomsticks, cauldrons of all types, owls of all size, and all sorts of strange and disgusting potions ingredients. They saw things that they never knew existed, and things they had only seen before in movies about magic. It was amazing to realize that so many of these things were actually real.

"We're going to that big white building over there," said Ella. "That's Gringotts." She led them to the building, and the girls managed to disturb the goblin guards by cooing over how 'cute' they were. Once past the outer doors, they all read the words in silver above the inner doors. A clever warning in a rhyme, which was also a spell that the reader cast upon themselves. Inside, over a hundred goblins were working at various counters, exchanging money, weighing gold nuggets, and examining gemstones. Grabbing Harry's arm, she pulled him up to a free goblin teller.

"May I help you?" sneered the goblin.

"Hello," greeted Harry. "I was informed that my parents may have had accounts with your bank at the time of their deaths. I was hoping you could help me determine if this is so, and to access those accounts should the prove to exist." Harry looked a bit embarrassed. "I'm afraid that I don't have a key or anything, but I hope that clever beings like goblins would have a method for replacing lost keys."

"Indeed. And what is your name, sir?" asked the rather fierce looking goblin. For an answer, Harry lifted his hair from his forehead, revealing the trademark scar to the teller. "I see. Griphook!" he called. "Griphook here can explain the lost key retrieval procedure, Mr. Potter, as well as help you with any withdrawals you need to make today. He will, of course, need to verify your identity."

"Naturally," grinned Harry. "It just wouldn't do to hand over gold to just anyone, now would it?"

"Indeed, Mr. Potter," grinned the goblin. "Griphook, please take care of Mr. Potter and his... entourage," said the teller, nodding to the herd of girlfriends waiting in the lobby. "Perhaps a private room is in order. It has been a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Mr. Potter. If you need further assistance beyond that which Griphook can provide, my name is Grimshard."

"The pleasure was mine, Grimshard. Hello, Griphook. Shall we retire to that private room now?"

"Yes, sir. If you and your party would follow me, I have a private room ready for you. A rather large room, given the size of your entourage.

* * *

After Harry and the girls were settled around a large conference table, Griphook placed a special parchment and quill pen down before Harry. "This, Mr. Potter, is a variation of a blood quill. It is designed to use the writer's own blood, magically extracted, as its ink. The parchment is charmed to create your family tree, using a combination of your blood, magical signature, and the extensive bloodline records maintained by Gringotts. Just sign you name here at the bottom, and the parchment will verify your family line, Mr. Potter."

"Will this hurt?" he asked.

"Only for a moment, after which the injury will heal over. It takes numerous repetitions with a blood quill in order to cause permanent injury."

"Right then, let's get this part over with..." Harry signed the bottom of the parchment, wincing as his signature was cut into the back of his hand for a moment. As the cut healed over, lines began to appear on the parchment. His family tree was being written before his eyes, as his parents' names were written, then their parents, and so on. The names continued to span farther and farther back, with the parchment growing longer and wider are more and more ancestors were revealed.

Eventually, they reached the end of Gringotts records, and the detailed family tree sank into the parchment. In its place, a list of wizarding family names – and their vault numbers – began to appear on the page. He saw the Potter name, as well as several others. A few of them were rather strange sounding. "Gryffindor? Hufflepuff? Ravenclaw? Slytherin?" he read aloud. "What kind of names are these?"

"Rather famous ones, actually," said Ella. "Those are four of the most powerful wizarding bloodlines out there. The founders of those lines also founded Hogwarts over a thousand years ago. And you are the sole heir to all four families!"

"Yes, there was another heir to the Slytherin family fortunes, but he ceased to be on the night he attempted to kill you, Mr. Potter." Griphook grinned evilly. "You appear to now own all shares of the wizarding world's most prestigious institution of higher learning."

"Huh?"

"Harry! You own Hogwarts!" squealed Ella.

"Now, you appear to be the heir to six major vaults, plus another seventeen minor accounts..." began Griphook.

* * *

When Harry and the girls walked out of Gringotts, they each carried a heavy pouch full of wizarding gold. Harry, as it turns out, was the heir to a fortune that measured in the billions of galleons (the gold coins of wizarding currency.) He was incredibly wealthy, and he had chosen to share that wealth with his girls – just as they had always shared whatever they had with him. Besides the coin, he also had a thick stack of Gringotts bank drafts, to cover larger expenses in increments of 1,000, 10,000, and 100,000 galleons, should the need arise.

"So, Ella, were do you suggest we start shopping?" asked Harry. Like the other girls, she had been given a heavy pouch of gold.

"If we're going to do some heavy duty shopping, then I would suggest we start with luggage. In the magical world, you can obtain trunks that can hold a great deal of possessions. There are more expensive models that are feather light, and some that can even shrink down small enough to carry in your pocket. Since money really isn't an issue for you, I believe that such a trunk would be an excellent place to start."

"Bloody brilliant! To the luggage store!"

* * *

"Hello, how may I assist you today? Looking for a school trunk?" asked a rather cheerful looking man... apparently a salesman (or is that sales-wizard?) for the store.

"Ah, yes. Hello," greeted Harry, laying on the Potter charm. "My lovely young friends and I are in fact looking to purchase school trunks. We decided to make a group outing out of it. Now, I understand that you can provide some more advanced models of trunks? Ella here recommended your fine establishment, as she recalled this shop having several trunks with the latest in security features, feather-weight and resizing charms, not to mention the very largest in expanded interiors."

"You do realize that such features are rather expensive additions to a trunk? Also, some of the more advanced security features are restricted to Ministry personnel only – specifically aurors."

"Really? How peculiar..." mused Harry, subtly brushing aside his bangs as he scratched his head in thought. The sales-wizard looked surprised at the sight of the scar. "Despite such restrictions, I'm sure we can come to some sort of accommodation..." he drawled, casually fanning himself with the Gringotts bank drafts – the one for 100,000 galleons clearly visible on the top. "After all, we're just a bunch of children, not a group of hardened criminals or the like."

"Oh, I'm sure that those pesky restrictions weren't written to keep things from children." The shopkeeper grinned slyly. "Especially not such a remarkable child as yourself."

"I am glad that we understand one another. Now, what's the best trunk you have? What are the best features? Do you have any models that can be connected internally? So that I could move from one expanded interior to another without exiting one trunk to reach the other?"

* * *

After about an hour, Harry paid a total of 256,400 galleons for his rather unique trunk. It was an experimental model, something that was being developed to market for the aurors. This special trunk had the ability to 'up-link' to specially designed 'satellite' trunks – something like an internal, totally secure floo network, using doorway portals instead of fireplaces. The concept had not really sold well, because of the prohibitive cost of the central 'hub' trunk, and the vast amounts of magical power needed to create or forge the 'up-link' portals. Luckily for Harry, he was an extremely powerful young wizard, fully capable of forging 'up-links'. It would take a bit of time to figure out how, but he wasn't worried about it.

Both the 'hub' and 'satellite' trunks were magically protected, self-shrinkable (i.e. no wand needed), feather-light, expanded on the inside, and shielded from magical monitoring by the Ministry. The 'satellite' trunks had three oversized compartments and a fourth that was a studio apartment, while the 'hub' trunk had the equivalent of a small mansion inside. Ella informed him that the shielding feature was worth the price alone, since it would allow underage witches and wizards to practice magic during the summer (something she herself could no do at present).

The 'hub' trunk had rooms to suite many purposes. There was a potions lab, an apothecary storeroom, a library (currently empty), several work rooms for various spell crafting tasks, a greenhouse, gardens, and exercise room. In addition to these special rooms were a full compliment of normal ones: kitchen, pantry, dining room, bath, master chambers, dorms, study, office, lounge, and even a game room. There were several empty rooms that could be customized later. Finally, there was a long, narrow room full of doorways, 100 in all, that could be linked to 'satellite' trunks.

Planning for the future, Harry purchased a full 100 'satellite' trunks, 37 of which were given to his squib girls (Ella wasn't part of the group, so she didn't get one.) Since the remaining 63 trunks were not connected to the trunk network, Harry was able to store them in one of the unfurnished rooms. Already, he had vague plans of using excess trunks to create his own private transportation network. After all, he had inherited multiple real estate locations as part of his inheritance.

Now that they had their own private space, they would need to furnish all the rooms. They would need beds, couches, chairs, tables, linens, carpets, and all the rest. Thankfully, Harry was filthy stinking rich. The girls would be able to furnish their new apartments, as well as Harry's secret mansion. Harry's main concern was stocking up the apothecary, potions lab, greenhouse, and libraries.

Taking a great risk, he set the squib girls free to shop in Diagon Alley, while he had Ella guide him through the rest of his school supply list. Once they were finished, he would visit all the stores the girls had made purchases from, and transfer the larger items into the trunks. Soon enough, he had managed to get everything he needed – including a full stock of potions material and supplies – except for his wizarding clothes and his wand.

He started the squib girls with getting fitted for witches robes, while Ella took him over to Olivander's for his wand. "Harry, do you think it was wise to turn the girls loose with that much money?" asked his guide to all things magical.

"Um... probably not, now that you mention it." Harry sighed. "I'll just have to hope that they don't get into too much trouble before they're finished."

* * *

"I thought I'd be seeing you sometime soon, Mr. Potter." The voice came out of the shadows behind them, scaring the daylights out of both Ella and Harry. Mr. Olivander emerged from his hiding place to gaze at Harry with his disturbing silver-white eyes. "It seems like only yesterday that your parents were in here buying their first wands..."

"Mr. Olivander, I presume?" interrupted Harry. With thirty-seven girls running rampant through the Alley, he didn't want to waste time on drawn out stories about the past. Now that he knew the way, he could come back on his own to hear them. "If I may ask, are there any Ministry restrictions on how many wands a wizard may own?" Having just one wand seemed rather... stupid. They were made from wood! A thin wooden rod was rather breakable!

"Such an odd question for such a young wizard, Mr. Potter. Truthfully, there is no legal restriction, since very few people are able to bond to more than one wand at a time. In fact, after finding their first match, few seldom even think about obtaining another unless their first one is somehow damaged. However, it is rare for a wand to share its wizard – for it is the wand that chooses the wizard, not the other way around."

"Really?" he asked. Now, why would it matter... "So, I would hazard to guess that a wand needs to be compatible with the wizard in question... magic to magic, so to speak." Yes, that makes sense, he thought. "Then an incompatible wand would give a wizard unreliable, possibly even unpredictable results? Possibly even no result at all?" Mr. Olivander nodded. "But, would a wizard find that one particular wand would be best suited for a certain branch of magic, while another wand would be better suited for a different branch? For instance, one wand being better for Charms while another for Transfiguration, yet both working well for the wizard in question?"

"My, my, Mr. Potter. You are a most unusual young wizard," beamed Mr. Olivander. "You are also very correct. Certain wands are predisposed for Charms, Transfiguration, or even the Darker Arts. Both the type of wood and the core itself lend themselves towards certain magics. Swishy wands tend to be better for Charms work – which can be a more delicate magic – while stronger, more rigid wands often favor Transfiguration. You have a keen grasp of magical theory, Mr. Potter."

"Could you recommend any volumes on the theory and practice of wand making? I find myself to be insatiably interested in the various ways woods and cores interact. I would like to read a bit further on the mechanics, if you will, behind magic wands."

"I believe that I could round up a few pertinent volumes to quench your thirst for knowledge. But first, we need to find your wand, Mr. Potter." He took out a tape measure, and began to take various measurements. "Which is you wand hand?"

"I am right handed, but I have learned to make almost full use of my left," replied Harry. "Now, if a wand needs to properly resonate with my own magical signature, then it would stand to reason that it would respond to a release of my magic. The wand or wands suitable to me would be sensed by me upon such an unleashing of magical energy." Olivander nodded slightly to himself. "Well, let's see how that works..."

Harry summoned up a pulse of his raw magic, and released it in a minor shock wave that raced through the wand shop. As it expanded outwards, he felt a sort of echo bounce back at him from several locations. Mr. Olivander looked on with interest as Harry used this magical sonar method to seek out those wands that resonated with his signature. He then went down the aisles to collect the wand boxes that had returned his magical call.

"These seem to respond to me, sir," informed Harry.

"Very well, Mr. Potter. Let us see how well you theory has translated into reality," stated Mr. Olivander. The first wand was very swishy, made from willow. "A good one for Charms work," noted the wand maker. The next was made from a rather rigid oak, and, "A rather powerful Transfiguration wand," according to the expert. He had five more 'specialty' wands, made from rowan, aspen, walnut, ebony, and wormwood. These were suited for Healing, Shielding, Dueling, Jinxes/Hexes/Curses, and Dark Arts respectively. Mr. Olivander looked a bit concerned by the last wand, but somehow Harry Potter did not seem the type to fall victim to the addictive qualities of the darker magics.

The last wand he had selected was what Harry would come to call his 'all-purpose' wand. It was made from holly, and had a phoenix tail feather for its core. This wand was the best overall match, as it resonated highly with most branches of magic. (The 'specific' use wands resonated higher in their branch, but quite a bit lower in all the others.) It was this wand, however, that drew Mr. Olivander's interest most.

"Curious. Most curious indeed," the wand maker mused to himself.

"Pardon, Mr. Olivander, but what is so curious about this wand?" asked Harry. He had a total of eight wands. Why would this one be so much more unusual that the other seven?

"Mr. Potter, I remember every wand I have ever sold. Every single one. The curious thing is that the phoenix whose tail feather resides in your holly wand gave another feather. Just one other feather. It is indeed curious that this wand was destined for your use, when its brother gave you that scar." He pointed to Harry's forehead. "Though, I suppose I should have expected it, given the source of the feathers in your other wands."

"Oh?" asked Harry. "And where did those phoenix tail feathers come from?"

"Your other wands, Mr. Potter, are all sibling wands. Sister wands, to be precise. You see, the feathers in each of them all came from the same phoenix. As I understand it, those seven feathers were the only ones given by a female phoenix, who happens to be the firstborn child of he who gave the other two feathers."

"That is interesting," agreed Harry. "So my special purpose wands are child-wand to my primary one?"

"You could say that, Mr. Potter. I shall be expecting great things from you, Mr. Potter. After all, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named did great things as well. Terrible, but great."

"Wow!" squeaked Ella, who had until then remained forgotten in the shadows. "You have almost the same wand as You-Know-Who!"

"You do realize that that is the most ridiculous thing to call him, don't you? Didn't the guy have a first name?" asked Harry. "Somehow, I doubt that his parents named him 'Lord'. It sounds like something he made up himself."

"He was not always known by the name which inspires such fear in the hearts of witches and wizards the world over, Mr. Potter," replied Mr. Olivander. "Once upon a time, I sold a yew wand with a phoenix feather core to a young muggle raised boy named Tom Marvolo Riddle. Over time, that boy was replaced by the dark menace that met his end at your childhood home, Mr. Potter."

"Thanks for the info, Mr. Olivander. Now, before we settle up, do you happen to sell wand holsters? I find that I need one. Make that several. Oh, and do you have those books you mentioned?"

Mr. Olivander did have several wand holsters available, including a customized design that could hold up to ten wands. It was a model requested by aurors, to hold the wands of prisoners. Harry, of course, purchased two – one for his wands, and one for just in case. After collecting several books, and the titles of several more for purchase elsewhere, he handed Mr. Olivander a nice little pile of gold for the items. He then added a small bonus, for the information about the Dark Lord once named Tom.

* * *

"Well, we've got some time before you can start collecting the girls," began Ella, "why don't we go get you a pet."

"Okay. My letter says first years can have a cat, toad, or owl. Any recommendations?" asked Harry.

"Well, toads aren't really popular anymore. I hear they were rather fashionable about a hundred years ago, but that was a bit of a fad, really. Cats are good, since they can learn to boost some magics. Oh, and they keep rats away from your dorm. However, most people go for owls. Magic folk use owls to carry their mail – sometimes they also use eagles, hawks, or falcons, but owls are the best. There's a store down the street that sells owls and owl accessories."

"Wizards accessorize their owls?" chuckled Harry.

"Not like that!" scoffed Ella. "I mean things like cages, perches, and owl treats."

"Ah! Cool. Let's go take a look at owls then. Maybe I'll find one that suits me." Harry let Ella lead him over to Eeylops Owl Emporium. Inside, they found all sorts of owls, from tiny screech owls that fit in the one's hand, to enormous eagle owls that could crush a man's head with their mighty talons. "See anything you like?" she asked, after several minutes of browsing.

"It is not so much seeing as feeling," replied Harry, who was currently standing in the center of the store with his eyes closed. "An owl would make a good familiar, but for a bond to form I need to find one that can match up with my magical signature."

"Alright, buddy! You need to stop reading your school books until after you get them home," scolded Ella. "You are absorbing too much technical mumbo-jumbo from that tome on magical theory."

"Sorry," he blushed, "but that book explains a lot of what I have already managed to do on my own."

"That's okay. So, any of these owls 'feel' right to you?" she asked.

"I like the feelings I get off of the snowy owl in the back corner." Both children walked over to the indicated owl. It was a female, and possessed a rather dignified stance for a post owl. "You seem like a nice owl to me, girl. So, what do you think?" The owl looked at him, cocking her head from side to side as she eyed him carefully. Finally, she bobbed her head once in acceptance of her new master. "Well, come on up." He held out his arm, the owl hopped on, then climbed up onto his shoulder.

"That's kind of freaky," admitted Ella. "I've never seen an owl take to somebody that quickly."

"What can I say?" asked Harry. "I want my owl to be the smartest one out there!" At his words, a burst of magic flared out from him, surrounding his as yet un-purchased owl. She appeared to glow for a moment, then resumed her normal look.

"Hey!" shouted the proprietor. "You start messing with an owl, you'd best be buying it!"

"Uh... sorry about that, sir," replied Harry. "I'm not exactly sure what I just did... but I had intended to purchase this fine owl already. So, no real harm done. I will also need a cage, a couple of sturdy perch stands, and of course several boxes of owl treats." His soon-to-be owl hooted happily. "Like owl treats, do you girl?" She nipped his ear affectionately.

"You are one freaky kid, Harry," whispered Ella. "I like you and all that, but you are rather strange."

"Thanks, I think," grinned Harry.

* * *

"Can we look in the Magical Menagerie?" asked Ella. "My folks won't let me have an owl, but they should accept a cat. Now that I have a bit of spending money," she held up her heavy belt purse, "I hope to find one that I like."

"Lead on, Gunga Din!"

"You're impossible!" chuckled Ella.

They moved farther down the Alley, waving to the squib girls running here and there on their spending sprees. The pair could hear and smell the Menagerie before they could see it. That many animals in such a confined space was like a mini-zoo. When they stepped inside, it was like nothing Harry had ever seen before.

There were sleek black rats, who were busy performing all sorts of tricks inside their cages. He saw several types of cats, some cat-like creatures called kneazles, and a variety of cat sized mammals. Along the side wall were enormous purple toads, neon orange poisonous snails, and a vicious looking lizard. In the window was a large tortoise, with a shell covered in precious gemstones. And, deep in the back, he found several breeds of snakes.

Ella was busy looking at the felines, so Harry went over to the snakes. For years now, he had felt a sort of communion with the leg-less reptiles. 'His' park back in Surrey was full of them, and they seemed to obey his wishes of avoiding the many children who played there.

:I am so bored: one of the snakes seemed to complain.

:Why complain: hissed another. :It is warm here, the wizard brings us mice, and nothing can eat us. What more do you want:

:Don't mind her: said a third. :She is shedding again. You know how shedding one's skin makes one ill tempered.: There were hisses of agreement.

"What would you do if you were free?" whispered Harry.

:I would find something other than mice to eat.: The small, bright green snake reared up to look at Harry. :One grows so tired of mice.:

"I know of a nice park. It is rather sunny, and it has a pond with many small frogs," said Harry.

:And birds? I always enjoyed a nice bird.:

"Yes, there are many birds there, too."

:I think I would like that place.:

"If you will let me, I can take you there," said Harry.

:I will trust you, wizard.: Harry opened the small snakes cage, and the little female snake slithered up his arm, curling herself around his left bicep. :Take me to your park now.: He took the snake to the counter, where Ella was paying for an adorable cream colored kitten.

"Find something to your liking?" he asked.

"Yes! Isn't she adorable?" asked Ella. "I'm going to name her Andromeda. So, did you find anyth- Aargh!" Ella jumped back as the small snake peeked out from under the sleeve of Harry's shirt. "What is that?"

"Oh her? She's just hitching a ride out of here," said Harry. :This is my friend, Ella: he said to the snake. :Please don't bite her.:

:As you wish, wizard.:

"Harry! You can talk to snakes?" squeaked Ella. "Bloody hell, you're a parselmouth!"

"I'm a what?"

"Parselmouth! You can talk to snakes!"

"Oh, that. I didn't know there was a name for it. Is that a problem?"

"Um... you may want to keep it a secret. Talking to snakes is considered to be Dark magic. From what I've heard, You-Know-Who was a parselmouth."

"In that case, let's just keep this between the two of us."

* * *

Harry spent the next three hours moving from store to store, settling up accounts for items purchased by his girls, shrinking items (no one had told him he couldn't do magic yet!), moving them into various trunks, and restoring them to their normal sizes. He was rather surprised by the amount of money thirty-seven young girls could spend in so short a time. It was enough to beggar a moderately wealthy family.

After settling up at Flourish and Blotts bookstore, Obscurus Books, Scribbulus Everchanging Inks, Slug & Jiggers Apothecary, the cauldron shop, Gambol & Japes wizarding joke shop, the junk shop, and several furniture and furnishings stores, he led his heard of girlfriends over to Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions. The girls all wanted witch clothing, and he needed to get himself some wizarding robes for school.

"Harry, are you really going to buy us clothes?"

"Can we get anything we want?"

"I think the robes the witches wear are awesome!"

"Do you know how a magical seamstress does a fitting?"

"Girls, girls! Let's just go inside and find out!" He led them inside, where the proprietress, Madam Malkin, looked rather shocked by the number of customers entering. "Hello, Madam Malkin I presume? The girls and I find ourselves in need of some non-muggle clothing."

"Oh my! There are so many of you! This may take some time!"

"Not to worry, ma'am. I can ensure that you will be well compensated for you time." Harry flashed her the remaining bank drafts. "My girls want to get new robes, and I mean to get them new robes."

"Of course, sir," agreed a suddenly much more pleasant seamstress. "Now, why don't the young ladies take a look at what I have available, while I begin taking everyone's measurements?" Upon hearing that, the girls all dashed over to the clothing racks, rooting through displays of robes, dresses, skirts, and blouses. "Oh! Oh dear!" exclaimed the witch.

"Just let them browse, ma'am, while you start measuring me," instructed Harry. "I need the full Hogwarts set, and possibly some nice robes for everyday and formal wear. The ladies will need... well, whatever strikes their fancy."

By the time they left Madam Malkin's, the shop was a near disaster area. Each of the girls now had dozens of witchy outfits, and they each had donned one set of robes to wear around the Alley. Harry, too, had donned a set of robes – he made quite a good looking young wizard, despite the Potter hair. Despite the devastation, Madam Malkin was one happy (if exhausted) witch. Such a large sales day meant her profits were way up for the month. And, most of the Hogwarts students had not even purchased their school robes yet! Best of all, these were growing children, so they would need wardrobe updates for several years to come.

* * *

After finishing their shopping spree, Harry and the girls headed back to Surrey. The rest of their summer would be spent delving through the many magical tomes purchased that day. With his already developed magical skills and self-discovered magical theory, Harry was able to rapidly progress through the first year materials. The girls were an asset in codifying further theories and laws of the various branches of magic.

With the deluxe potions brewing equipment he had purchased, Harry managed to brew up many useful concoctions. The books he had found detailing common potions mistakes, the basic, intermediate, and advanced rules of ingredients, flame temperatures, and stirring explained why certain ingredients could not be combined, specific temperatures were required, and what quick clockwise stirring could do that a slower counter-clockwise one could not. The rules were detailed and complex, but knowing them made potions a much easier subject to practice.

Astronomy was simplified by the large crystal model of the galaxy that he had indulged himself with, for he could readily call up the visible constellations for any given day whenever he wanted. The placement of the heavenly bodies could influence other magics, especially potions, herbology, and divination. Care of certain magical creatures sometimes depended on lunar cycles – werewolves, for example. The moon's pull sometimes drastically changed the properties of certain potions ingredients, thereby necessitating when they could be harvested.

Charms and Transfiguration turned out to be more of a case of mind over matter. After careful study, one of the girls – a shy red-head named Jamie – determined that all the incantations and wand movements were little more that pneumonic devices to help under-powered witches and wizards focus their power on the task at hand. Spells, hexes, jinxes, curses, and the like could be performed without speech or wand movements. All that was required was a more intense mental discipline – a firmer focus, if you will. Several of the more advanced books mentioned this to be true, but few in the magical community ever bothered to learn the discipline to accomplish silent magic, let alone to cast spells without wand movements.

Healing turned out to be a mix of spell casting and potions brewing. Both Herbology and Care of Magical Creatures were rather self explanatory. For that matter, so were Ancient History, Muggle Studies, Defense Against the Dark Arts, and Divination.

Arithmancy and Ancient Runes were rather interesting, despite only being offered starting in the third year. The first dealt with applying mathematical principles to spell work. With it, one could measure and refine a know spell, or even craft an entirely new magical effect. The latter branch detailed how to inscribe magical effects into symbols of power. When combined together, these two branches of study allowed for the creation of magical artifacts, including such items as pensieves and time turners.

Drawing from all the source information they had available, Harry and the girls began to simplify and condense the principles and theories of magic into new instructional texts. They were the first books written to learn magic from a muggle perspective, drawing references to popular fiction, scientific examples, and other muggle cultural examples.

Almost before they knew it, September 1st arrived.

* * *

**In answer to questions posed by reviewers:**

_Wavefunction:_ Don't expect it. I will follow cannon except where forced into AU by changed events.

_DestroyerDRT:_ Yes, she will... among others.

_fopalup1:_ I may skip a book or two, if I think my AU warrants it. No plans for a squib house – at least nothing that the teaching staff knows about!

To everyone else who expressed interest in my version of the story... Thanks! I hope you like what comes next.


	4. The Hogwarts Express

_June 9, 2005_

_**Hogwarts Express:**_

Harry and the girls had spent most of the summer working in the trunk network - after Harry figured out how to connect the satellite trunks to the central one. All of the books purchased from Diagon Alley were carefully sorted and organized in the library, where many of the girls could be found reading up on various subjects. Many also spent their time in the developing greenhouse, the gardens, or the potions lab.

Since potions brewing was one of the most impressive branches of magic that squibs could readily use, Harry soon had a rather impressive stockpile of beginner level potions. More difficult to brew compounds were being added daily, as more successful potions and fewer explosions were produced. Taking a page out of muggle books, Harry's potion lab included such safety features as a ventilation hood, dragon hide aprons, impervious goggles, and charmed glass barriers. As a result, very few potion 'failures' needed magical healing or countermeasures.

A few of the more advanced girls had also begun to delve into the worlds of Arithmancy and Ancient Runes. Although they could not cast spells or empower runes themselves, they were fully able to research the theories behind their working, and design new arrangements for Harry to test out. Once they had finished their calculations, they bribed him to come implement their creations. (The bribes usually involved either kisses or Mars bars.)

Harry actually learned a great deal about casting spells through this rather unique learning method. By first going over the arithmatical mechanics behind a given spell, he was able to figure out not only what a spell was supposed to do, but also how and why it worked. Though he wouldn't find out until he reached Hogwarts, his spells were much more focused and powerful than was normal for his age group.

During the end of July and all through August, several additional trips were made into Diagon Alley. Besides the need for additional furniture and the like for each girl's trunk/apartment, the researching children found that they needed additional reference materials, potions ingredients, and magical artifacts to study. Sometimes, such artifacts were deconstructed and reverse engineered to understand how they worked, or just to improve the original design.

The girls were delighted to learn that while they couldn't cast spells (even borrowing one of Harry's wands), they were perfectly capable of using magical artifacts. This included items from wizarding joke products all the way up to such items as pensieves, broomsticks, and sneak-o-scopes. Some items, like a pensieve, required Harry to perform certain steps - such as actually moving memories into the basin - after which they could work on their own.

Within weeks, several of the previously empty workshops resembled the junk shops in Diagon Alley. Once contained various disassembled items, including watches, clocks, dark magic detectors, omnioculars, moving quidditch action figures, a wizard's chess set, half a dozen bludgers, several snitches, two lunascopes, a put outer, a box of remembralls, a wizarding tent, a regular multiple compartment trunk, five sets of gobstones, several decks of exploding snap cards, a secrecy sensor, and a collection of wizarding wireless receivers. If it used magic, the girls wanted at least one to examine.

Another workshop was set up with every type of magical detector, measuring device, and spell decoder they could find. If you could use it to analyze an enchanted object without a wand, they had it in the reverse engineering lab. Some of their instruments were modified medical tools, similar to what mediwitches and mediwizards used over at St. Mungo's hospital.

The squib girls were not restricted to those items they could find in the Alley. At practically every store, they asked for and often obtained owl order catalogs. Hedwig was kept quite busy delivering orders and returning with shrunken purchases. They even had open accounts in many shops down Knockturn Alley before the end of summer.

* * *

Finally, September 1st rolled around. Harry had made his 'family' rather happy, for not only had he informed them that he would be making his own way to King's Cross station, he had hardly been seen all summer. Ever since his girls had started coming to the Dursley house to find him if he wasn't let out, they had adopted a policy of pretending that he didn't exist. At the very least, they acted as if he was a common border. They no longer asked where he went, and he did his best to be gone more often that he was present. They were a prime example of a disfunctional family, but somehow they managed to go on.

Harry had received his train ticked by owl, along with the vaguest of instructions on how to reach a magical train platform, after sending Hedwig off with his acceptance letter back in July. Luckily, he was able to phone Ella after her return home. She gave him much more detailed instructions on how to find Platform 9 ¾ - and he really had to wonder yet again about how the average witch or wizard's mind worked. A fractional number for a train platform? Who came up with these things?

He made the rounds to all the girls, giving the 'public' goodbye before heading off for a year of boarding school. Despite his uncle's desire to spread the story that he was going to an institute for criminally insane boys, Harry told his girls' parents that he had a scholarship to a school for the 'gifted'. (That cover story still made him chuckle when he pondered the irony of it. Gifted indeed!)

The girls would see him nearly every evening and on the weekends - thanks to the trunk network - but the adults didn't need to know about that. Their cover was a newly formed center for young girls - sort of a private female-only youth center set up with Harry's money - where they could spend their evenings and weekends in independent study. Harry would just have to bully them into maintaining top grades, so that the adults bought the story.

Having made his farewells, he took a taxi to the train station, all his school gear safely stowed away in his trunk - which was shrunken down to fit into his pocket. He had left Hedwig free to find her own way to Hogwarts. When he asked her how she wanted to travel, she had hooted when the flying option was given. So, it was just Harry exiting the cab, with wands hidden in the wrist sheath concealed beneath his shirt sleeve, school supplies tucked away in a hidden trunk, his ticket in his shirt pocket, wallet in the left jeans pocket, and coin purse in the right.

"Wonderful," he murmured to himself, looking at the station's prominent clock. Although he had left early just to be safe, the heavy traffic had gotten him there with only fifteen minutes to find and board his train. And he had been hoping for a bit of time to explore! "Oh well," he sighed, walking to the barrier between platforms 9 and 10. Apparently, he wasn't the only one to arrive a bit behind schedule.

The other tardy group was a party made up entirely of red heads. There was an adult woman who just had to be the mother of all the children. The eldest child was a somewhat stuffy looking young man with horn rim glasses and a shiny badge on his chest. He was also the only one with an owl on his trolley. Next in age came a pair of twin boys, who had a certain air of mischief about them. Third came a boy about Harry's age, who was tall and thin. Lastly, there was the only female child. Harry could hear her complaining about having to stay behind while her brothers all went off to school.

From the look of her, she would be joining them next year. He judged her age to be no more than a year behind the youngest boy. She was very cute, but what really drew Harry's attention to her was the mane of deep red hair, falling down her back like a waterfall at sunset. Taking the bull by the horns, so to speak, he walked up to the first magical family he would ever meet.

"Hello, beautiful," he practically purred into the girls ear, leaning in from behind to ensure that only she heard this greeting. She, in turn, squeaked and jumped around to face him. "Hello. My name is Harry. I'm going to be starting my first year at Hogwarts. Will you be joining me on the train?" he asked, knowing full well that she wouldn't. As he spoke, he was using the training that his girls had given him, to send out dozens of subtle body language signals to calm and reassure the startled girl.

"Oh, no. I won't be going to school this year," she replied shyly. "My brother Ron is starting his year, but I don't get to go until next year." She practically pouted as she said this, and he found that she looked adorable while pouting. "My name is Ginerva Weasley, but everybody calls me Ginny."

"A pleasure to make your acquaintance, oh beautiful Ginerva." She blushed at the compliment, but was smiling widely at his antics. "My full name is... now please, don't laugh or scream or anything... Harry James Potter." Despite his warning, she flushed pink, then paled, before finally blushing a bright red. "Are you alright, Ginerva? Uh... Ginny?" The poor girl appeared to be in shock. Well, he knew a sure fire way to snap her out of it, but would he be thanked for slapped for the presumption? Oh well, nothing ventured...

Harry leaned in and gently kissed the stunned girl. Unfortunately, it was just at that moment that her mother happened to turn to see who her daughter was talking with. "Ginerva Weasley!" bellowed a voice like a force of nature. "What do you think you are doing young lady!" The fiery matron then focused her rather impressive stern glare upon him. "And just who might you be?"

"Mum!" gasped Ginny. "I... I..."

"I'm terribly sorry about that, ma'am," interrupted Harry. "This was entirely my fault. I knew that I was risking a slap in the face - or worse - but how can mortal man resist such beauty?" Yeah, he was really laying it on thick. "My apologies, ma'am. I did not intend to take liberties with your daughter." Both he and Ginny managed to blush at that point.  
He looked at the station clock, and was shocked to see how much time he had spent observing and meeting Ginny. "Er... I really have to go right now. The train and all that." He took Ginny's hand in his, raising the back to his lips. "Until we meet again, fair flower." She blushed again, while her mother frowned her disapproval. He then darted through the barrier and onto the magical platform.

As he crossed, he could hear Ginny saying, "...but he's Harry Potter!" Boy, would he like to hear the rest of that conversation!

* * *

The platform was just as Ella had described. The bright red steam engine, the owls flying all over and cats running here and there, not to mention the chaos of students saying farewell to their families. It was a scene unlike anything he had ever seen in the muggle world, yet somehow it gave a feeling of familiarity.

As he approached the train, he saw a young girl struggling to drag an oversized trunk on board. Several older students, wearing green trimmed school robes, were making fun of her bushy hair, large front teeth, and her general inability to move her own trunk. They were needlessly cruel, and the poor girl was on the verge of tears. At a glance, Harry had her pegged at the scholastic/brainy type - the type of girl who spent all her time with books, blew the bell curve in all her classes, and had no real friends.

She was also the type of quiet girl who could become a rather passionate woman. He had no interest in such things yet, but he was aware that that would change in a few years. Other than the teeth, she was a rather cute girl - and oversized teeth could easily be fixed with a simple potion. Now, if only her personality was as attractive as the rest of her...

"Say, did you all forget how to cast a feather-light charm over the summer holidays?" he asked of the girl's tormentors, using a simple question to mock them. "Not to worry! I read about it just last week!" With a flick of his wrist, the holly wand shot out of the holster and into his hand. A gentle wave of that wand, and the girl suddenly lifted her near weightless trunk with ease. "I'm rather surprised that even if you couldn't remember the charm, none of you would simply lift it for this gentle maiden." The obviously Slytherin students just glared at him. "Of course, I guess I shouldn't expect so much from children that lack a respectable family background."

"I'll have you know, little boy, that my family is one of the oldest, most noble pureblood lines," snorted the leader of this little gang.

"You descend from a noble family? With piss-poor manners like that?" Harry feigned surprise.

"Manners are something inferiors use to show respect to their betters," retorted the leader. "When you are from an obviously superior pureblood family, you do not humble yourself to your social inferiors."

"Really?" asked Harry, pretending to be interested in what the older boy said. "No manners towards you inferiors? Huh! Well, if that's how things work in the wizarding world..." he shrugged, then whipped his wand at the Slytherin students and blasted them off their feet. "Out of my way, inferior scum!" He then stepped over the sprawled students, relieved the girl of her trunk, and guided her into the train's corridor. Upon finding an open compartment, he guided her inside, setting her luggage into one of the overhead racks. He then retrieved a handkerchief and handed it to his companion.

"Oh, thank you ever so much!" she said. "Those boys were just... just awful! I hope most of the students are nothing like them."

"So tell me, fair maiden," he began, making her blush, "do you think any of them will comprehend the irony in what I just did?"

"You mean how they told you how to treat inferiors, then you treating them in that manner? No, probably not." She grinned at him. Like he had noted before, only her over-sized front teeth detracted from her looks. The bushy hair should, but somehow on her it just worked. And it's not like he didn't understand wild hair! Still, she was very pretty when she smiled. Her whole face lit up. "I'm Hermione Granger, first witch in the family," she introduced herself.

"Muggleborn? How wonderful! My parents were magical, but events led to me being raised as a muggle by my relatives. My name's Potter. Harry Potter."

"Watch James Bond movies much?" she giggled.

"Why Moneypenny, whatever do you mean by that?" he teased. She giggled even more. "My girlfriends made me watch them originally. They claimed that I should be able to relate to the main character, given my manner with the ladies."

"You have a girlfriend?" frowned Hermione.

"Actually, that was girlfriends, as in plural," he argued. "I just couldn't decide on one of them, and they decided to share me. They all claim that I'm too much trouble for one girl to handle... Do you think I should take offense to that?" She looked a bit confused. "Oh, don't worry. There's always room for one more girl on my dance card." He gave her a wink, and she blushed a very pretty pink. "So, since I played the valiant knight, saving the fair maiden from the vicious trolls," she giggled, "will I be receiving the standard reward?" Hermione blushed past pink and into the crimson ranges, but still leaned over and placed a chaste kiss on his cheek.

Harry didn't really do chaste very well, however. Before she could pull back, he turned his head until her lips were on his. She tried to jump back, but he had strategically wrapped his arms around her back and was able to keep captive for a few more moments. His considerable kissing experience came into play, and she found herself relaxing into her very first kiss (outside of family). She relaxed against him, while he taught by example the basics of kissing.

"Thank you, fair... or should I say sweet?... Hermione," he stated after ending their first kiss.

"Wow!" she blurted. "That was... and you... we just... I feel... Wow!"

"Will you be my first girlfriend at Hogwarts?" That pulled her out of her shocked babbling. "I am starting to really like you. I sense that you and I could be really great together. But I must warn you that if you say yes, you will have to share me with my other girls... and probably with a few more once we get to school. If you want me, you will have to learn to share."

"What? At the same time?" she gasped, broaching a possibility that he had not yet considered.

"Well, I hadn't really thought of it that way, but in a few years... it might be fun!" he laughed.

"You're so bad!" she scolded. Reading her posture and expressions like a book, Harry could tell that this normally reserved girl was deciding to do something wild and impulsive. He guessed that what she felt during their kiss was making her curious, confused, and just a bit wild. "Um... I can't believe I'm doing this, but... Okay, I'll be your girl - even if I do have to share you."

There was a sudden change in her expression, and he could tell that her mind had suddenly kicked into high gear. "Wait a minute! You're the Harry Potter! I've read all about you! You're in _Modern Magical History_ as well as _The Rise and Fall of the Dark Arts_, and _Great Wizarding Events of the Twentieth Century_!"

"I'm that Harry Potter? Thanks for telling me," he teased. "I thought I was the other one." She gave him an appropriate look, then rolled her eyes theatrically. "See, that's what I like about you! You don't take any of my bull, but you still find it amusing. Somehow, I just know that you will reign in my wilder impulses. Without my other girls here to keep me grounded, I'll need your help to toe the line."

"Do you only like me because you think I can help you?" He could see the worry in her eyes... that he would be like the kids in grade school. They only wanted to be her friends right before exams, or when participation in the science fair became mandatory. Hermione was 'that' type of girl.

"Actually, I first wanted to get to know you after seeing you cute bum trying to lift your trunk." She blushed. "What do you have in there, anyway? No, never mind. So, after spotting your cute tush, I got a look at your face. Other than those front teeth - which can be adjusted easily with a reduction potion - you are an incredibly cute girl. Then, after I popped my eyes back into my head," she giggled, "I was able to take note of your determination in the face of adversity. And now, I'm getting to know you. I like what I've learned so far."

"Oh. Well, that's good then," she said. "For a moment there, I was afraid..."

"...that I only wanted a smart friend?" he finished. She blanched, then blushed a light pink. "I'll admit that I do like smart girls," he then admitted, "but I assure you I am more than capable of doing my own homework. I just find smart girls... attractive."

"That's good, because I am really smart," she said, then blushed as her words registered.

"Yes, you certainly are, Hermione," agreed Harry. "Now, why don't you come over here, besides me, and tell me all about yourself?" He held out an arm, and she settled herself beside him. Harry wrapped that arm around her shoulder, and after a momentary hesitation she settled into his side.

"Well, both of my parents are dentists..."

* * *

Harry and Hermione were happily cuddling when the compartment door opened. Several young girls, who looked to be fellow first years, peeked inside. "Hi. Do you mind if we join you?" asked one. "All the other cars are full, and some of the older students are getting rather noisy."

"Of course we don't mind!" grinned Harry. "Come right in! Join us! There's always more room for beautiful girls!" They blushed, but came in to sit. Hermione elbowed him in the stomach gently, then rolled her eyes at his blatant flirting. "I'm Harry, and this sweet little thing is my newest girlfriend, Hermione."

"I'm Padma," said a girl who looked to be of Indian descent. She had an exotic beauty.

"Susan," stated a slightly plump girl with strawberry blond hair, currently pulled into a long braid. This one would have a killer figure, once she grew into her figure.

"My name is Blaise," added a pale skinned, dark haired beauty with vivid violet eyes. When this one got older, she would be dangerous. Even at this young age, she possessed a body language that seemed to challenge any male she met. Of course, Harry loved it.

"So, would any or all of you ladies be interested in becoming my girlfriends?" Harry grunted when Hermione slapped him in the gut. "Oh, you will have to share me with my current girlfriends, who include Hermione here."

"You don't know the meaning of tact, do you Harry?" asked the bushy haired girlfriend.

"Hey, if they are going to take offense this early in our relationship, then it probably would be a bad idea for us to get involved."

"Why would we want a boyfriend?" asked Blaise. "Boys are stupid, immature jerks."

"Let me guess... pureblood?" queried Harry. She nodded. "I've met a few pureblood boys already, so I can understand you sentiments. However, I think that you will find that I am not like them."

"If we agree to let you be our boyfriend, will you kiss us?" blushed Padma.

"Yeah," agreed Susan, "I'd like to learn how to kiss."

"Of course!" he was quick to reply. "Who wants to go first?"

"You can start with me, Casanova," mock pouted Hermione. "After we show them how it is supposed to work, then you can show them in a more personal manner."

Harry spent several minutes snogging Hermione. When she was a melted mass of witch, he moved on to Susan, whom he also reduced to a gelatinous state. Next came Padma, and finally the doubtful Blaise. She had a rather drastic change in her attitude towards boys - at least towards one special boy.

Once everyone had received their kisses, the five first years sat around talking about with wizarding world, whatever magic they had already learned, and guessing as to what Hogwarts would be like. Padma turned out to be rather quiet and shy - she told them that her twin sister was the bubbly, outgoing one. Blaise was rather cool and reserved. Her attitude was a byproduct of her upbringing as a 'noble' daughter. Susan proved to be nearly as shy as Padma, until she felt comfortable with her companions. After gaining her confidence, she became very talkative.

Then there was Hermione... Harry's first Hogwarts girl was rather bossy, liking to do things 'her' way. They would have to work on that. Such an attitude could be an asset, so long as it wasn't taken too far. Past a certain point, it became annoying... a form of arrogant bullying. Hermione could be the leader of the girls - witch and squib - if she avoided alienating them. Like Harry, she had an alpha-type personality.

Harry told them about his rather extensive preliminary studies, and promised each of them access to his growing private library. Hermione, Padma, and Blaise where very interested in this, and upon seeing their enthusiasm, Susan began to warm to it a bit more. When he mentioned the study books he was compiling, all the girls begged him for copies.

Harry's study guides were a sort of 'idiots guide' to magic, filling in the many gaps and loopholes he found in their school textbooks. He sought to explain the theory behind each bit of magic, so as to make the actual casting (or in the case of potions, brewing) much easier when first attempted. He was even working on a way to understand and harness the so-called 'accidental' magic.

Part of his rather unique approach was introducing arithmancy right from the start, rather than waiting until the third year of study. He had broken down the basics of this branch of magic, and applied it to a scientific formula that most muggleborns could more easily understand and explain - not to mention incorporate into their own spell work. A large part of his method was a series of short-cuts not commonly known or utilized.

* * *

The train ride continued smoothly, with no one bothering the Boy-Who-Lived and his travelling companions. A part of this was because those students who both knew who he was and that he was on the train were already sitting in his compartment. When the witch with the snack trolley came by, the three magic born girls gave Harry and Hermione a crash course on wizarding sweets. They were surprised when Harry insisted on paying for everything, telling them, "I takes care of my womens," in an exaggerated accent. Not one for sweets (his girls had adapted him to a more nutritional diet), he preferred to eat some fresh fruit he retrieved from his trunk with the pumpkin juice offered.

All four girls expressed envy when he had whipped out his school trunk (a.k.a. the 'hub' trunk). He promised to tell them all about the self-enlarging charms on his trunk at a later date. And they didn't even realize that it had multiple compartments, some of which were greatly expanded on the inside!

By the time they had arrived at Hogsmede station, the five first year students had laid the foundations for deep friendship... and a deeper commitment for later years. Leaving their luggage on the train as instructed - except for Harry, who carried his shrunken trunk in his pocket - they joined the other first years heading towards the giant of a man calling them. This guy was the largest person any of them had ever seen; Hermione compared him to wrestlers she had seen on an American telly program. He stood as high above regular adults as those same adults stood above the first years. Harry idly wondered what a woman of similar size would look like as they climbed down to the lake and boarded the small boats waiting for them.

Following the large man's instructions of no more that four to a boat, Harry's new girls all shared one boat. That left Harry to slip into another, holding a rather prissy looking blonde boy and what looked to be Dudley's long lost brothers. Privately, he had to wonder if this boat was more heavily loaded than the girls' boat would be if he had pushed the four person rule.

Just by looking at the blonde, Harry was certain that this was one spoiled little brat. He wore fine looking clothing, but the several stains on the front let everyone know that he didn't properly care for them. While everyone else was looking at their new school with awe and amazement, blondie managed to find fault with nearly everything around him. He complained that his family home was nicer, that the boat leaked, the lake smelled funny, and his boat was too close to the muggleborns. The way he kept glancing at his companions let Harry to believe that they were bodyguards, and that blondie wouldn't be so vocal if they strayed from his side. 'Great', he thought, 'a spoiled rich coward of a bully.' Blondie just had to be among the purest of the purebloods. Harry irritated the hell out of him by completely ignoring him for the entire trip.

"Who are you?" blondie finally asked. He had restrained his curiousity until they were exiting onto the docks. "What's your family name?" Man, this kid was like a parody of a stereotypical snob!

"Someone who doesn't care to respond to rude little albino arseholes like yourself," countered Harry, not bothering to look at blondie when he replied.

"How dare you! Do you have any idea who my father is?" raged blondie.

"The only arsehole bigger than you?" Most of the children around them easily heard that response, and laughed at blondie's flushed expression. Deciding to push the envelope a bit, Harry adopted a tone of false concern. "Oh, I'm terribly sorry! Were you seriously trying to find out who your father actually is? Have you been searching for years for the stupid git who sired you into this world? I hadn't realized you were literally a bastard." The others could barely keep the grins off their faces.

"I know who my father is!" shrieked the boy. "His name is Lucius Malfoy!" The other students sniggered with mirth. Blondie had throbbing veins on his forehead.

"Then why the bloody hell are you asking me who he is?" scoffed Harry. "Wait a sec... are you a bit slow in the head? Is that why Tweedledee and Tweedledum here are escorting you everywhere? Did your father pay them to help keep an eye on you?" Most of the first years were now laughing so hard they were in tears.

"I am not slow in the head!" Blondie's voice became shriller and shriller as he got worked up.

"You yell like a girl, blondie," he stated quietly. "Oh! Now I see where this is going... Sorry, but I don't go that way. I like girls."

Blondie's head was seconds away from exploding. "I'M NOT GAY!"

"Come now, denial isn't good for anybody. There's no shame in being gay, blondie. It's all cool. I don't swing that way myself, but I'm sure someday you will find your perfect guy. Just hang in there." The pseudo-bodyguards began to slowly back away from the furious albino, while the onlookers continued to laugh so hard several fell over.

"I'M NOT GAY! YOU HEAR ME? I'M NOT!"

"Like any straight guy spends that much time on his hair and clothes!" smirked Harry. "Well, maybe for a hot date, but you've been with the twins there ever since I first saw you. Do you like the big, strapping lads? Face it, the writing's on the wall, blondie. Hide in the closet all you want, but sooner or later you'll have to come out and face yourself."

"I AM NOT A HOMOSEXUAL, YOU STUPID BLOODY GIT!"

"What is going on out here?" asked the rather severe faced witch who had opened the castle doors behind blondie's back. "Why are you yelling, young man? If you had already been sorted into your house, I would be deducting points for this unseemly behavior! Now, all you first years follow me."

* * *

Authors note:  Just so everyone's clear, this last seen with Malfoy was homophobe bashing, not gay bashing. Somehow, I just see the older pureblood families as having more irrational phobias than any group on Earth. What better way to conquer irrational fears, than by making them seem even more ridiculous than usual?

To my reviewers:

Up until this point, I have been playing up the Dumbledore's faith in his little alerts and alarms. The way I see it, Hagrid only showed up in canon because Harry never read his letter. From my perspective, so long as Harry sends in his response, Albus thinks Petunia is doing her part, and Harry's doing just fine. To further his assumption, reports of Harry in Diagon Alley would only reaffirm that everything is just fine.

Also, I realize that Blaise Zabini has been officially declared as a male student, but I've read too many fanfics with a female Blaise. Quite frankly, I like Blaise as a female, since the canon hasn't had much about him/her. (Plus, this is an alternate universe here.)


	5. The Sorting

July 1, 2005

**The Sorting:**

The students followed the professor, Deputy Headmistress McGonagall, as she led them from the docks and up into the castle proper. Most were still giggling over Blondie's performance. McGonagall seemed pretty angry over the blonde boy's behavior. Harry was thinking while he walked, but his new girls were talking quietly amongst themselves.

"Do any of you find it odd?" asked Hermione. "How quickly he got us to agree to be his girlfriends?"

"Actually, I had worried about that a bit," admitted Susan. "I mean, I don't want to get a reputation or anything like that. Plus, I never wanted to kiss a boy before. Then here comes Harry, and we're kissing, and it is like…"

"So good!" giggled the other three girls.

"Yeah, he's a great kisser," agreed Susan.

"There's more to him than that, though," said Blaise. "I've grown up among pureblood nobles. Most of them are smooth, debonair operators. Pureblood males are trained to know their way around women. I've seen them work… felt their charm in action. Harry puts all of them to shame. He's good. He's very good."

"Tell me about it," agreed Padma. "I always thought father had a way with the ladies. After all, he has a wife and two concubines." At their looks, she added, "Hey! It's our custom. So, the idea of sharing a man isn't that unusual for me. Still, I believe that even Daddy would find Harry to be a gifted ladies man."

"The question is, can we trust Harry's motives?" asked Hermione. "Is he for real? I mean, he is rather famous… Is he with all of us just to build on that reputation, or does he really care about us?" They all stopped to think about that. "He seems sincere, but I just wonder if he is. I hope he is."

"Well, I think…" Blaise was cut off when a bunch of the other kids began to scream. The girls all turned to see a bunch of ghosts. Hermione was the only one not familiar with such quirks of the wizarding world, but after a moment to gawk at their translucent silver images; she turned back to her new friends. "As I was saying, I think he is sincere. Something just tells me that he can be trusted."

"And, he's cute," commented Susan.

"Yes, he's really cute," agreed Padma. "That messy hair, those emerald eyes…"

"Hey, do you think he's worried about us, too?" Blaise suddenly wondered.

"What do you mean?" queried Hermione.

"Well, he IS the Boy-Who-Lived you know. "It is quite possible that he could come to see us as… what's that muggle word for people who follow those… rock star people?"

"Groupies?" supplied Hermione.

"Yeah, groupies!" agreed Blaise. "What if Harry thinks we're just a bunch Potter groupies?"

"I never though about that before," admitted Susan. "I bet that there are people who would flock to him just because he is famous. People like that blonde kid who claims he's not gay."

"That was Malfoy," supplied Blaise. "My parents are friends with his. He's a pompous little git… just like his old man." McGonagall had returned, and the first years were beginning to file into the Great Hall. "It looks like it is sorting time." They began to move forward.

The girls moved up to walk behind Harry as they entered the hall. Even for the magic-born children, the sight was one to inspire awe. Hundreds of candles floated above the five great tables. Four tables ran the length of the room, and were filled with the returning students. At the far end of the enormous room, the fifth table lay perpendicular to the others on a raised platform. The teachers and staff sat at this one.

Harry noticed the magical wonders, but having spent some time in the magical world, he was less than amazed. Rather than gazing at the wonders, he was looking at all the girls around him. For some reason, his reactions puzzled Dumbledore. He noticed the headmaster's reactions almost immediately, mainly due to the rather intense gaze he had focused on the young man. Plus, there was a certain… vibe… coming off the old man. Dumbledore was very interested in Harry, and the boy in question was discomforted by said interest. He almost… felt… like Uncle Vernon would when he was looking at the new model sports cars. Creepy!

"Wow!" said Susan, drawing his attention away from the head table. "Look at the ceiling!"

"It's enchanted to look at the night sky," supplied Hermione. "I read about it in…"

"Hogwarts, a History," chorused everyone in the budding group.

"Hermione, you really need to quit with the know-it-all routine," scolded Harry. He tried to be gentle, but he had dealt with girls like her before. This would be for her own good. "We know you are a fountain of knowledge, but you shouldn't shove it in everyone's face. I'm not saying that you shouldn't answer questions or help those who ask. All I'm saying is that you shouldn't volunteer quite so much information. It can be a little bit…"

"Snobbish." They turned to look at Padma. "Well, it is. Brain snob," she teased the brunette.

"Alright, I get your point," sighed the muggleborn. Deep down, Hermione knew that her lack of people skills drove others away. She would either try too hard to impress them, or remain too far in the background to be noticed. "I'll try to restrain myself. Oh, look! I think we're starting!"

"Attention please!" called McGonagall. She stood before the teacher's table, holding a scroll of the names of the first year students, and standing besides a stool with an old hat on it. "First years! When I call your name, you will come up to me, place the sorting hat on your head, and be placed into your house. After you have been sorted, place the hat back on the stool and join your housemates at your new house table."

They were quiet as McGonagall began to read from her list. "Abbot, Hannah," was the first name on the list. She put the hat on her head, and after a moment a tear formed in the brim. It opened like a mouth, and the hat yelled out "Hufflepuff!" The next name called was "Bones, Susan."

"Here I go…" said Susan. She went up and put on the hat. This time, there was a significant pause before the 'mouth' opened and called out "Hufflepuff!" As with Hannah, the farthest right table began to cheer as Susan walked over to join her new house.

There were more sortings, most of which the four remaining companions ignored. Well, that wasn't exactly true. They noted names and houses, but since these were students they didn't yet know, there was not reason to focus on them.

Then the professor called, "Granger, Hermione!" The brainy girl went into Gryffindor after a long pause, much like what had happened with Susan. Shortly afterwards, Harry's pal blondie went up after "Malfoy, Draco!" was called. The hat didn't even touch his head before it called out "Slytherin!" Somehow, no one was surprised by that decision. A few more people were called, and then she read out "Patil, Padma!"

The first Patil twin went into Ravenclaw after a lengthy pause. The second twin, Pavarti, went into Gryffindor almost immediately. And then she called out "Potter, Harry!"

Suddenly, all the students were muttering. As he walked up to the stool, he could hear students muttering "Potter?" "THE Harry Potter?" "Harry Potter's come to Hogwarts?" Dumbledore was once again giving Harry that creepy, intense look. What was with that man? Most of the observers grew silent as the hat descended upon his head.

'Ah, another difficult one!' he heard in his head. 'So you are the one influencing all those girls, with their remarkable minds. I think you will stir things up a bit. You are not quite what He has expected. You will disrupt a great many of His plans. Quite a past you have there, Potter.'

'Thanks, I think,' he thought back. 'Whose plans will I be disrupting? Voldemort's?'

'Oh, his plans will be disrupted, too,' chuckled the hat. 'You will be rather difficult to place, Mr. Potter, especially now that you know about your rather unique heritage. He had planned to keep you ignorant of that, until you were much older. Now, any of the houses would do well for you, but which would be the best I wonder?' thought the hat. 'You can be incredibly loyal to your chosen friends, but you also have an outstanding drive to learn. There's bravery here… Oh my, yes, but also cunning, and a thirst to prove yourself. But, where to put you?'

'Where does the old man want me?' thought Harry, picturing Dumbledore as the placer. 'I've noticed the looks he's been giving me ever since I entered the hall. He's a meddler, I can tell. The headmaster is the other 'He' you mentioned. Am I correct?'

'The Headmaster?' asked the hat, the capital letter clearly heard in his mind voice. 'He cannot influence my decisions! But I do know how he would like to influence my sorting. He hopes to have you in Gryffindor at best, and out of Slytherin at worst.'

'I'm almost tempted to say put me in Slytherin just to piss him off.' The hat chuckled. 'Creepy old man is starting to annoy me… particularly if he will meddle as much as you say. However, he will better underestimate me if I am placed according to his plan. I won't be his pawn, but he doesn't need to know that right now. So, I suppose you should just put me in where he wants me to be.'

'If you're sure?' asked the hat. 'Well then it better be…', "GRYFFINDOR!"

The Gryffindor table erupted into a chorus of cheers. The Weasley twins started doing a silly little dance, chanting, "We got Potter! We got Potter!" Dumbledore looked like Dudley on his birthday. The other tables looked a bit disappointed, and the Slytherins seemed a bit angry. Funniest of all, Blondie appeared to have swallowed a bug.

A little while later, she called up "Weasley, Ronald!" who joined his brothers with the lions. Finally, the sorting ended with the last of Harry's new girls, "Zabini, Blaise!" who went to Slytherin. Harry had a girl in each house. Was fate messing with him, or did his unique heritage just draw him to the qualities of each house? He would have to think about that further.

With the last student sorted, the Headmaster rose to speak. "Welcome to all our new students, and welcome back to all our returning students. I know that you are all hungry, so I will hold all announcements until after the feast. Let me just  
say a few words for now. And they are, nitwit, blubber, oddment, and tweak! Now, tuck in."

* * *

The meal was excellent, from the moment the food first appeared at the tables, until the moment when the remains all vanished. Harry sat next to Hermione (his Gryffindor girl), and they wound up holding hands for most of the feast. Some of the other children made ventures to talk with him, but the ones who were seeking the Boy-Who-Lived legend were pushed aside. Most were content to stare and whisper amongst themselves.

He was able to meet his fellow first years (other than Hermione) in the house of red. There were two other girls that he met that night: Lavender Brown and Pavarti Patil – Padma's twin sister. Then there were the boys. There were four other boys in his year: Neville Longbottom, Seamus Finnigan, Dean Thomas, and Ronald Weasley. Pavarti and Lavender were the typical popular clique type (i.e., pretty, bubbly, and a bit shallow. Your basic pre-teen girls). Neville was somewhat shy and clumsy, but Seamus and Dean were more normal. Then there was Ronald.

Harry had an interest in his younger sister, Ginny, whom he had met at the train station. He had three older brothers still at school… fifth year that was the male prefect, and a set of twins who were the resident pranksters. Ronald, however, had a boat load of issues to deal with. Almost immediately, he had ogled Harry like he was a two headed goat. With eyes as round as a kid at a freak show, he had asked to see the famous scar. When Harry refused, he got all prissy and started pouting. Soon after, he began making snide remarks about wizards riding on their fame.

Harry was guessing that ickle Ronnie had a plethora of jealousies, most involving his elder siblings. When he asked the twins, he found out that they had two brothers out of school – one had been head boy, the other quidditch captain. As the youngest male child, Ronald received all the hand-me-downs at the end of the hand-me-down line. Since the family wasn't financially solvent, everything he owned was a hand-me-down. So, like he thought before, young Ronald had many issues.

Afterwards, the Headmaster made some announcements, which included a list of prohibited items (mostly pranks), several general restrictions, and a warning about a certain third floor corridor that contained a horrible, painful death for all trespassers. A few students laughed, but most took his words very seriously. Harry was beginning to wonder about the sanity of witches and wizards. This was a school for heaven's sake!

Why was there a hallway that could dish out a painful death to trespassers? In a school with eleven year old children no less! What, exactly, was wrong with these people? You cannot just tell children not to go somewhere! At least a few of them would push the envelope. He had practically guaranteed that someone would sneak in, just to break the rule! The Headmaster was starting to worry him. Hell, the wizarding world was starting to worry him!

Just before the children were dismissed, he heard a voice whispering, "Pssst! Harry!" He turned to find Blaise waving him over.

"Let's go see what she wants," said Hermione. They moved over towards the Slytherin table, to find that Padma and Susan had come over to join them. "So, what's up?"

"Can we all come down early for breakfast?" asked Blaise. "It will give us time to talk and stuff before the others come down. We can have a little alone time with our boyfriend."

"That's an excellent idea!" Susan grinned. "And during the day, we should all keep an eye out for places where we can hang out."

"Oh! I hear that the library is rather extensive," said Hermione. "We could meet there!"

"There are also the grounds," countered Padma. "They might be pleasant during the fall and spring months."

"First years!" came the call. "Follow your prefects to the dormitories!" ordered the Headmaster.

"Hurry up and give me a kiss!" squealed Blaise.

"Me too!" said Susan.

"And me!" agreed Padma.

"I can wait until we get to the dormitories," said Hermione, looking smug. "Ha! I get extra Harry time!"

"We know," growled Blaise. "Don't rub it in. Now, kiss me!" She grabbed Harry by the shirt and pulled him into a hot kiss. Well, hot for an eleven year old girl. Some of the older students began to giggle at the display, and it only got worse after Susan and Padma snogged him before dashing off to join follow their prefects and housemates.

"Come on, Harry! Time to go!" she said, grabbing his hand and racing off after the Gryffindor prefect… who just happened to be another Weasley. Hopefully, this one was less like Ron and more like the twins. Harry liked the twins. They were funny, laid-back, and believed that the school rules were more of a set of general guidelines than absolute truths.

The Weasley prefect, Percy, led them through the school, up stairways, and past the moving portraits. Looking around as they walked, Harry marveled at the somewhat frivolous uses magic was put to by the magical community. Moving, talking portraits were all well and good, but why in the world did the staircases move? Not escalator moving, but more of a random swinging from one place to another. If it was upon command, he could see it – but random movements? Why? Then there were the trick stairs, doors requiring passwords (or touches in the right places), and even patches of wall that just pretended to be doorways.

Just because a person could do something, it wasn't a reason to do it. Magic folk seemed to worry more about whether or not it can be done, and less about why anyone would bother in the first place. Hogwarts was so weird!

* * *

Eventually, they reached a portrait of a somewhat overweight woman in a pink dress. Percy stopped in front of her, and she calmly asked, "Password, please?" Well, apparently there were practical uses for talking portraits.

"Caput Draconis," replied Percy, to which the woman bowed. The painting then swung out from the wall like a door, revealing a hole in the wall. Apparently, this was the entrance to Gryffindor tower, and the painting was their gatekeeper. The students filed in, and encountered a veritable ocean of crimson and gold.

"Hey, Ne," chuckled Harry, "you ever see that Nicholson move, the Shining?"

Students near them jumped back when she snorted out in laughter. "Well, the color scheme's here, and we have a set of twins who can talk in unison…"

"Did someone mention us?" chorused the Weasley twins.

"See what I mean?" she said. Both she and Harry laughed some more.

"What did we do?" asked the twins.

"Hermione here was just making an observation, comparing the common room to a muggle movie," explained Harry. "In the movie, there was a scene were doors opened to release a surge of blood, and there were these twins who appeared and talked in unison."

"Muggles watch these… movies… for fun, right?" asked one of them.

"What kind of people would watch one about blood?" asked the other.

"It was a horror movie," stated Hermione. "Something we watch to scare us. It's a thrill sort of thing."

"Muggles are" "so weird," said the twins.

"Oh, and walls that pretend to be doors and moving staircases make perfect sense," retorted Harry.

"Well, no," "but they are fun," they replied.

"Harry," said Hermione, "I'm going to go check out my dorm, maybe find a book to read. Meet you back down here in about half an hour?" she asked.

"Sure thing, Ne."

Harry went up the stairs to the boys dormitories, and found the room for first years at the very top of the tower. Inside were five beds, four of which already had trunks in front of them. Taking a wild guess, he claimed the fifth bed for himself. Standing by the foot of the four poster bed, he retrieved his trunk from his pocket and enlarged it. Once he placed his hand on the scanning plate, the trunk's security features verified his access rights and he began to unpack the 'public' items.

He filled the wardrobe with his school clothes and robes. Shoes were placed under the bed; along with a set of dumbbells he used exercise. As a final touch to his decorating scheme, he placed pictures of each of the squib girls up around his bed. As soon as possible, he had to get pictures of the four new girls to add to the collection. Just as he was finishing up, some of the other boys came up to the room.

"Hi Harry," greeted one of them… an Irish lad named Seamus. "Those pictures of your family?"

"Not really. They're my girls," he replied proudly. "We're not related, but were kind of a family."

"So, they're all your girlfriends?" asked another roommate… Dean, if memory served. "How do you manage to juggle that many girls?" he asked.

"Oh, they all know about each other. It's so much easier to have them share."

"Bloody hell," uttered his third roommate, Neville.

"Well, what would you expect from the great Harry Potter?" snorted the final roommate, Ronald Weasley. This particular Weasley brother had been giving Harry dirty looks all throughout the welcoming feast. Well, not from the start. First, he had asked to see the famous scar, but after Harry refused – he didn't want to become the local freak show – Ronald had gotten all teed off about it. Now, to Harry's utter joy, the bit dumb prat was in what appeared to be a jealous rage. More accurately, another jealous rage in what was sure to be a long history of jealous rages.

"What's your damage, Weasley?" demanded Harry.

"Oh, pardon me. Far be it for me to question the great Harry Potter." With that, Ronald stormed off to the bathroom.

"Man, what a prat!" exclaimed Seamus.

"That boy has problems," agreed Dean.

"H-he's just… just jealous," stuttered Neville. "Wanker."

"Yes, but jealous of what?" wondered Harry. "He hasn't even know me for five hours yet. How can he be jealous already?"

* * *

"Oh, there you are," greeted Hermione, when Harry came back down from his room. She was sitting on one of the 'Shining' couches, dressed in a nightgown and her robe. Sitting in her lap was a rather large book on charms. "Sit with me?"

"Of course," he replied, sitting besides her. He had also changed into his pajamas and donned a robe. "What are you reading?" He looked at her book. "Mmm… that's a good one. As luck would have it, the volume I brought down for you is also on charms. Here." What he handed her was the slim volume on Charms, which he had compiled through his work with the squib girls. Hermione eagerly began to read it.

"This is a very good book, Harry!" she enthused. "It really explains how everything works. I'm surprised the school doesn't use it to teach us. Where did you find it?"

"Read the cover," he replied softly.

Hermione flipped the book closed, taking note of the title, 'A Guide to Charms, by Harry Potter and the Squib Squad'. "Wow, you actually wrote this? I'm impressed."

"Well, it was a collaboration of effort, really. I couldn't have done it without my girls. Over the summer, we went over thousands of books, on a variety of subjects. This volume is our interpretation of the magical theory behind basic and intermediate Charms casting."

"If your other interpretations are as good as this one, then I think I'll have a real advantage over the other students! We have to get copies of your works to the others as soon as possible!"

"I'll drop a note to the squib girls tonight, and ask them to copy our compiled works for each of you."

"Thanks, Harry! You're the best boyfriend ever," she giggled. He finally got his goodnight kiss from Hermione.

* * *

To my readers:

Sorry about the delay in posting. I've been working on some of my other story ideas, trying to get them to the point where I can start posting. I've also been struggling with a few points in this story, which I just couldn't get to come out right in the first 100 revisions.

Several people have asked if I have stories posted elsewhere. The answer is no. is my first experience in posting stories. Other than here, these stories only exist in my notebooks and in my mind. I hope to have the start of some additional stories ready to post in the near future.


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